I'm done, I'm finished, I am NOT COOKING THANKSGIVING DINNER FOR MY IN-LAWS NEXT YEAR!
This is my digital oath. And I'm stickin' by it!
Talk about pearls before swine... here's the story.
As you know, my in-laws "invite" themselves to our house for Thanksgiving (and several days before/after) because it is convenient for them as a stop-off on their way to their summer home for fellow fossils in Florida.
I'm not keen on having them for ANY extended period of time, but I suck it up because my family visits as well during the year. Fair is fair.
What pisses me off is that they ruin a perfectly good holiday. RUIN IT! Why, you ask? Because they do not understand the concept of 'a peaceful and joyful holiday of thanks'. Here's how the holiday went, in a nutshell:
I am awoken at 6:45 am by my father-in-law shouting at my son to "bring me the TV clicker!". Of course, this wakes up my 16 month old, who immediately starts howling to be changed and picked up. Does my mother-in-law step up to the plate so my husband and I can get a few more minutes of sleep? No. She's busy in the kitchen reading a two-day old magazine. (*note* the last time I slept in in my house was in February of 2003-- I got until 8am. BLISS) So, I'm up at the usual time and not happy about it. Oh well. On to cooking.
Cooking for company on a Thanksgiving holiday is either all or nothing with me. You either set a fancy table and prepare a home-cooked meal, or you go out. It's a matter of personal pride, I guess. So, even though I had planned on having an "easy" thanksgiving, it really turned out to be an all-day cooking event. Two pies, pre-dinner snackies, beef tenderloin, home-made mashed potatoes, veggies, gravy... Lots of food and none of it "offensive" to my father-in-law, who thinks that spaghetti is best served with ketchup and never uses spices, sauces, or dressings on ANYTHING. Folks, I worked my ass off all day cooking, washing up pans, setting the table with the good china, polishing silver. I felt that it was Thanksgiving, and we should celebrate.
[Normally, my husband, USMCman, would be helping (somewhat) by polishing silver and setting up. Unfortunately, he had wrenched his back out of whack the previous morning by over-zealous weight lifting at the gym (honey, you're not 18 any more!)and so he was flat on his back in the living room, popping muscle relaxers. No help at all.]
Dinner was done, the food looked great, and I called everyone to dinner. There was a surreal moment of quiet and then the pack of hyenas attacked my food. A frenzy of forks and knives clinking for a few minutes and then everyone was done! They ate their ENTIRE MEALS in the time it took me to cut Thing2's meat up and then they left the table to go watch TV. TV! I was so pissed, I felt like spitting acid. I feel that a special meal deserves appreciation. Adoration. Reverence. People should dine--not inhale their food. That wasn't the case with my in-laws. Within mere minutes, they were up and gone from the table, leaving me with Thing1 and Thing2. Were they complimentary on my cooking? Yes. As they rushed past to go see the rest of the football game!
It was then that my terrible oath was formed. I SWORE that I would never cook a fancy dinner for them again. I will NEVER bust my hump cooking, cleaning, and setting a fine table to let it all go to waste in a 10 minute swinefest. NEVER AGAIN. USMCman has seen my iron resolve and has promised me that next Thanksgiving, we will be "away". Wherever. I don't care. I'm not cooking a holiday meal for them again.
The next meal they get will be at their wakes.
5 comments:
I'm so sorry. I know that doesn't help, but I do feel really bad. Having cooked similar thanksgivings, I would be really pissed if I didn't get my ovation and family time. Passes chocolates and a choclate martini.
If it makes you feel better I drove 3 hours for my turkey day with screaming Houdini baby. (she wants to get out of her carseat.)
Poor baby!! Next year I'm making a feast at my house--YOU are invited!!
XCircMan busted his rear making a wonderful dinner again this year. I tried to help as much as I could and tried not to be in his way too much. Twelve happy people chowing down.
The guest list included our pal, 80+year-old A-, and her 80+year-old sister. Most everyone sat outside in the beautiful SoCal weather. XCircMan really needed to be with his guests, so I offered to sit inside with the two old gals. Now granted, I LOVE A-, and I don't like being outside, so it was okay...but it was like being at a reverse-kiddie table.
Still though, a good time was had by all.
What did XCircMan cook? Anything I should get the recipe for? Do tell! I had a beef tenderloin and I'll have to admit, I liked it better than turkey. Of course, I know that deep-fried turkey is supposed to be awesome, but I haven't a deep-fryer and since nobody ever cooks for ME on Thanksgiving... haven't tasted it yet. Did XCircMan fry his turkey? What did you eat, Sithi?
XCircMan made turkey breasts (no ghetto dark meat for us!) and I bought a Honeybaked Ham. He also had stuffing (which he says sucked since it came out of a bag, and not his own recipe--no time), mashed potatoes (I made those), rolls, roasted mixed veggies, green beans and some weird vegetable thing another guest brought that no one ate--because it looked so odd. Overall, everything was wonderful and delicious and we ate and ate.
You come visit me and I'll cook for you, Infomatrix!!
My dinner at the holidays are edge of plate. I am a vegetarian and no one makes anything special just for me. I can't complain. My dad and stepmom usually have 20 plus people for T-giving and Xmas. They cook quantities and they hope there is something everyone will eat.
They aren't big on people bringing food though. This might stem from the breaking of Rhonda's favourite dish, which caused big holiday trauma several years ago.
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