Every once in a while, I witness something that completely flabbergasts me; something that falls into the "now I know why aliens won't land on our planet" category. These epiphanots are few and far between, but when they happen, I feel like my eyes are burning out of my skull.
While at the House of Hell (read: in-law's house), I finally got a blessed hour of peace and quiet with USMCman late in the evening. No in-laws bothering us, kids asleep... just hanging out in the TV room. I was reading a book (The Curse of Chalion by Lois McMaster Bujold-- excellent!) and USMCman was doing the lightning-flip through the channels. Suddenly, he froze and made a yelp of horrified fascination. I looked up to the TV screen to see a woman on her hands and knees on an examination table, her naked butt up. A "medical practitioner" was putting on gloves and chirping, "If you go to all the trouble to make your body look good, you should at least make your anus look good as well." Yeep!
We couldn't tear our eyes away... it was like a car crash, you just had to look! Fascination with the abomination. Are you ready for... ANAL BLEACHING?
Yes, the show Dr.90210 was showing the latest, greatest way to spend money-- anal bleaching. The waxing, followed by bleaching, makes the skin color around the anus the same color as the rest of the buttocks. How nice.
We continued to watch as the woman happily had her anal hair ripped off with tape and then some sort of caustic bleach material put on her tukkus. Eewwwww! The woman had HUGE, rubbery lips, as if they'd been blown up with lots of air. (Later, the TV show kindly informed us that the woman was a porn star, which explained the visit for anal bleaching as well as the ginormous lips. Work-related, I guess.)
Interestingly enough, the grossest part of the event was after the 'procedure'. The person performing the bleaching finished up, patted the porn star on her ass (Seriously! Like a dog!) and rattled off a few zippy catch phrases about the joys of anal beauty, how lovely and hygenic it is. Then she turned the handle to the procedure room door to leave-- STILL WEARING HER NASTY, USED RUBBER GLOVES! I almost fainted with the horror of it all. How unsanitary!
How silly. Am I the only one who hasn't heard of this? Is this a new thing? Other than porn stars, who else would do this? Maybe I shouldn't ask that question...
2 comments:
Uh, gross! I have never heard of such a thing and I can't think of anyone who would want to consider having such a procedure performed on them. It is an anus (A! N! U! S!) for Pete's sake! It is the final off-ramp on the highway of life! I didn't know there was a way to make something like that look "better". Maybe there shouldn't be.
Ewwwwwww....
Plus, who even THOUGHT of that in the first place?? Can't you just imagine some plastic surgeon's meeting..
"We're running out of things to do to people...what part haven't we worked on yet? ...Hey!...I know....."
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